I seriously have a bad relationship with food. It has a control over me like nothing else, I love food.

I wish I like all the good stuff for you but sadly I love all the fatty shit foods you can get. The worst it is for you the more likely I am to be obsessed with it. Which is the reason I am the size I am.

If salad tasted like a greasy burger i’d be on it.

I find it so difficult to find foods I like that are actually good for you. It’s more to do with texture then taste if I’m honest. I think I’ve always been a picky eater since I was small and considering we didn’t have much money and I pretty much refused to eat healthy things, it was just easier for my mum to give in and give me what I wanted.

I know she feels bad about it and I don’t really understand why, She was in a difficult point in her life and I was a pain when it came to food.

Sadly it has become quite difficult now to find foods I will eat myself. I force myself to eat salad and certain things you would put in such salad, but it’s difficult trying new foods. I also find that everything that is good for you is so much more expensive. How about you raise the price of all the shit food and lower the good stuff. Maybe then Britain wouldn’t have such a problem with obesity in children.

I have to admit I am the kind of person who eats their feelings so every time I am down or upset the food is the one who saves me. I always feel guilty after and I’ll always end up eating more. It is such a vicious circle and it is hard to find a way out.

I’m in desperate need if cooking and food advice. It’s really difficult too with my allergies to find things I can have as healthy snacks. I get to the point where I think I need to do something about my beastly appearance, but again with lack of knowledge and confidence to go to the gym i just get nowhere.

Just thinking about a gym makes me feel sick. All the gym bunnies looking at me or taking the piss out of me. I could only imagine what they would think of me. I could never do it alone. I couldn’t take it if someone made fun of me. My confidence would be shattered in seconds!!!

Apparently yoga is meant to be good for blobs like me. Maybe I should try that.

This needs some research.


Vicky out!


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